LIFE, Relationships

Giving grace in a friendship

When I was organizing my books a couple of weeks ago, I came across a book I’ve had ever since my husband and I were married.

book of poems

I found this poem about friends and thought, “Why not wrap the week up with this poem?”

 friends“Oh, the comfort-the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person.

Having neither to weigh thoughts,

Nor measure words–but pouring them

All right out-just as they are-

Chaff and grain together-Certain that a faithful hand will

Take and sift them-

Keep what is worth keeping-

And with the breath of kindness

Blow the rest away.”


Dinah Maria Mulock Craik

I’ve written a lot this week about friendships. At times I fear I’ve sounded a little too calculating. But let me be very clear.

Long-term friendships that run into trouble deserve our best effort always. We all go through times when we are too sensitive. We all go through times when life is so hectic our friends can’t connect with us the way we’d like. They say things that hurt; we say things that hurt.

My main point has been that there are indeed friendships that are toxic. They’ve never been what we thought they were and facing up to that hurts a lot. But sometimes we do have to move on.

Just make sure you are honest with yourself as to why. Make sure you are acting in integrity. Make sure you have let God in on the process. Trust me on this one.

I’ve come close to really screwing up. Thank goodness, God has “checked” me before I did.

I’m so fortunate to have the friends I do. Yes, we’ve run into some rough spots but we’ve waded through and come out the other side, closer than ever.

I’m also fortunate that I have a daughter who is a “bestie” as well. And a husband who is the “bestest” of all.

But my “bestest bestie” always understands me, always loves me always forgives me.

 One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin,
 but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Proverbs 18:24

We must always show as much grace to our firends as we can. Someday we may need them to do that for us.

God bless and have a good day.

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