Liking ourselves relieves depression’s ups and downs

Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

Liking ourselves can relieve our depression. But before we discuss that, let’s examine depression.

Liking ourselves keeps us off the roller coaster ride

google images

We recover from depression in leaps and bursts. We’re sure we’re never going to get better.

We might have good weeks and bad weeks.

There are good days and bad days.

Good moments and bad moments.

Recovery from depression is sporadic.

Depression, by its very nature, flings us all over the emotional spectrum. Just like any illness, it’s the normal process of healing.  It’s never a straight shot from point “A”, to point “B”. It’s almost always a roller coaster ride. And if we know that it in advance, it helps.

Sometimes we don’t know what causes the ups and downs, We can’t control people and circumstances. Even the weather can send us in a tailspin. But we can learn to like ourselves.

And we can’t judge our recovery by those ups and downs either because we all experience our recovery differently as well.

Different people exhibit depression differently

Moods are seldom stable even if one doesn’t experience depression. It’s a rare person whose moods stay even-keeled on a consistent basis. Many times we mistakenly ascribe the word “stable” to people whose personality is more lowkey. But even people whose basic nature is calm, struggle at times with fluctuating moods.

Don’t assume you know

Then there are those who can be very “noisy” on the inside, even though they’re very quiet out the outside. We put way too much stock in people’s outward behavior in determining whether a person is depressed or not.

For example, my husband has a very low-key personality. When he is in a low mood it looks very different from me whose personality is more like the energizer bunny. When I’m feeling down, it’s obvious, with him not so much.

Depression looks different on different people. That person that looks all-together may indeed be struggling with depression. So, be kind and smile to everyone. Like yourself as well with smiles and kindness. You never know how it might… Click To Tweet

Don’t be discouraged about your recovery

So no matter where you are in your recovery, take heart by knowing that the roller coaster ride you’re on doesn’t mean your recovery is in jeopardy. You’re just experiencing normal fluctuations on your journey to health.

moods

When we’re experiencing a depressing kind of day though, it’s DISCOURAGING.  On these kinds of days, it pays to look back and try to find some cause and effect. And there is always a trigger for our depression. Moods aren’t all over the place for no reason. But don’t give up.

When your mood drops

How have your last few days been?

Have they been up and down?

Can you pinpoint any causes? We can’t always but that doesn’t mean there isn’t one. It only means its alludes you fo rnow.

Don’t despair, however. Start tomorrow and monitor your day and if your mood starts to fall even a little, stop and take a quick assessment of how you’ve been thinking or talking to yourself.

Our spiraling moods often begin with our THINKING and words.

What about liking yourself?

two monkeys hugging each other/being friends with ourselves

It’s amazing how we wouldn’t think of saying something unkind to other people (Or at least, I hope that’s the case), but we talk to ourselves as if we are our own worst enemy.

You know what?

When you do that, you are you’re own worst enemy. Don’t do that!

There’s something to be said for just the opposite. Being your own best friend. Liking ourselves.

So let me ask you, how do you talk to your best friend?

Accordingly, that’s how you should be talking to yourself.

How can we like ourselves?

The difference between a happy person and an unhappy one may well be whom you consider your best friend? We may not always have our best friends. They may move. They may die. Therefore, liking ourselves, being our own best friend, is so important.

We will always have “us”. Doesn’t it seem then like we should have a good relationship with ourselves?

However, it isn’t narcissistic. On the contrary.

Steps to liking ourselves

So the first thing we do is agree with the Potter that how He fashioned our clay is OK by us. When we love and accept ourselves we let God know we are in agreement with His blueprint.

Secondly, we talk to ourselves like we talk to our best friends. We talk to ourselves as though we like ourselves. When we need encouragement, we give it, generously. We forgive ourselves and give ourselves a second chance.

We give our self kudos when we do something good but we also call ourselves up short when we need a good talking to. Being a friend to ourselves means we are honest with ourselves as well. WE don’t ourselves a free ride. A true friend wants the best for you and tells you the truth. We need to do the same. Want the best for our self and telling ourselves the truth.

Thirdly, we are good to ourselves. I love to treat my friends to little surprises. I love to give. We should give gifts to ourselves. It doesn’t have to be anything we purchase, it could be time to have coffee and read a few chapters of a novel. It could be a fancy coffee at our local bookstore. (That would be me.)

Concentrating on “me”.

Years ago I found a small tray at a garage sale. I painted it white and cut out the letters ‘ME” from scrapbook paper and glued them on. It was a reminder that it was OK to be good to myself. I don’t have it anymore.

small tray/ words ME glued on with scrapbook paper

I may have to make another one. We don’t need to feel guilty by thinking of ourselves and putting ourselves first now and then. I don’t find anything in scripture that says to be unkind to ourselves. If you do, let me know.

Obviously, we can take this too far. But I think doing something small just for ourselves is a good thing. It’s how we find and keep our joy.

God bless and have a good day,