Authentic honesty with God isn’t always easy. I am currently house-purging in every area, right down to notebooks. In the case of notebooks, journals, etc., going through them to see if there is anything important I need to keep. As a result, I came across some entries that I found very enlightening. I share one with you today just in case you have ever felt this way and need some validation.
So here goes (without any editing).
Heaviness inside, no, just a sense of unease.
The future, the book, aloneness, friendship.
Thoughts trying to find a place to stop and rest.
Emotions following close behind, shouting, “Wait for us!
Feeling slightly off kilter.
Can’t find my moorings.
Going the only place I know to set my anchor.
When I read what I wrote, I felt encouraged. Encouraged because I knew where my source of renewal and energy comes from.
It gave me a deeper understanding of how I process as well. It is through words. I guess that’s why I write.
There are at least five reasons to be truthful with God, whether we journal or not, and certainly in prayer.
1. You learn that God is faithful.
You can read your deepest, most hurtful thoughts and see how God was faithful. This is actually very Biblical. One of the most frequent words in the Old Testament is “remember”.
God knew we couldn’t remember without writing it down, so he instructed Joshua to tell each nation’s leader to gather a rock from the Jordan and write on it.
2. You learn that God doesn’t punish honesty.
God doesn’t punish honesty, but he certainly does dishonesty. So when you write your thoughts, write them as though they are just between you and God. If you are worried about someone finding them, do them as a private online journal. However, nothing beats actual paper and pen. Find a secret hiding place if you must. Or a secret file on your computer.
3. You learn writing is cathartic. It really is. Next to talking with someone, it’s the best way to get some things off our minds. It keeps things from building up and quiets our emotions. If we write it, there’s a good chance we won’t blow up and say something we regret.
4. You learn about yourself.
When I read those words I included here, I thought, “Did I write that?” Seriously. I thought maybe I had written down what someone else said. But I always indicate somewhere on the page if I’m quoting someone. It really gave me some insight.
5. Authentic honesty DRAWS YOU CLOSER TO GOD
Don’t you always feel closer to someone when you know there is no pretense between the two of you? Have you ever had a friend keep something from you, and you feel betrayed? You thought you were closer than that. Right?
Believe it or not, God is not much different. Yes, he is holy, so his feelings of betrayal are from the perspective of holiness, not humanness. But that God felt betrayed is evidenced through the stories of the Bible. So you don’t want to be that person.
It’s not easy being honest before God, but it’s essential to our deepening relationship with him. If only we’d remember that God sees right through our pretense. It would make our prayer lives explode with effectiveness.
God bless, and have a really good day.
PS. I’m working with a new program, so today’s post is late, and tomorrow’s might be as well.